Smell Ya Later 2012.

I don’t really make resolutions. I won’t shit on people who do, but a resolution to me is pretty much a one-way ticket to failure. I’ll say, “I WON’T DO THIS” only then I will and feel like a FAILURE DOUCHE. So, instead of wasting my time on promises I probably won’t keep, lemme look behind so I can maybe change a couple things going ahead, ya?


– This was an odd year. In some ways it was a huge disappointment. We were financially tapped and that makes enjoying life a lot more difficult. Sure, we had the basic necessities, but not much more than that. You can make due, but sometimes making due grates on you and you feel like you’re missing out on a lot. Friends go places and you can’t go with them because you can’t afford it. That’s sobering. Necessary, but sobering.

– I got a new job that I both loved and hated. I loved it because compared to my last job, it was easy. The customers I talked to on a daily basis were (by a vast majority) nice. That was a huge change for me and one I really appreciated. For those that have never done it, working in a call center is a mind-numbing experience. It’s monotonous and you quite literally never stop talking on the phone. You play Russian roulette with each call because you don’t know what you’re going to get. However, none of that was what made the job hate-worthy. All that shit’s to be expected in a call center. I had a couple coworkers who were rude. No other way to put it – they were rude. I go out of my way to be nice to folks and these people for whatever reason were just socially inept asshats. A pair of them ignored me at times like I wasn’t even in the room (one said about twelve words to me in the entire year I was there). At one point, I looked at my supervisor and asked her why people in her department were so angry all the time. Her answer? “I really don’t get it.” Now, some of my coworkers were wonderful to me and I adore them still, but unfortunately, even their kindnesses didn’t balance out the rampant douchewaffling of a couple folks there.

– My health pretty much sucked again this year, though interestingly enough, ALL AROUND I was better. I’m figuring my need for some time off from work probably factored into certain coworkers having rattlesnake-like dispositions, but there wasn’t a lot I could do about that. My diabetes kicked my ass. I had (and still have) real issues with hypoglycemia. Add to it a lot of vertigo problems from unbalanced fluids in my ears and you have a recipe for disaster. I was sick a lot. I fell down a lot. I passed out a lot. I seem to be moving toward a better place lately, but that’s a recent change.

– Writing-wise, this was a weird, fantastic year. I finished Wagon Witch’s Daughter back in the spring of 2012. I’m inordinately proud of that book even though it’s not going to see an editor’s desk for some time. I had the opportunity to rewrite one of my previously submitted manuscripts and I tackled that in a frenzied whirlwind through the months of June and July. Fifty thousand words in six weeks, thankyouverymuch. I have more news to share on that project’s fate soon, but for now, I have to keep a lid on it. Needless to say after the rewrite I was pretty tapped mentally, so I took my time figuring out my next project. A Curse in Clay, a novel about cowboys and fairies, is pushing 40,000 words now. I am aiming for it to be done next year.

– As for people this year, I made a few new friends, maintained my core friends, and feel like I succeeded with my social circle in general. I’ve befriended an awesome guy in New York named T.S. Ferguson who’s an editor at Harlequin Teen. Not only is he smart and funny, but he has tons of insight into the writing industry AND he feeds my growing appreciation of K-Pop. One day, the two of us will drink drinks and talk about pretty boys together. My Bridgewater Crew is all moving onward and upward. Eric got a new job that all of us toasted last night. Greg is continuing his education at HAH-VAHD in January while Lauren’s met with her own writing success (but you’ll have to read her blog to get deets when she’s ready to talk about that.) Dave’s working his ass off day in and day out and pretty much keeping me from lighting myself on fire whenever I touch electrical appliances. His brother, Matthew, moved in with us in the fall and is helping us with domestic things until he can find a job. Also, I got a new puppy named Fielder:

Dim But Sweet.

Dim But Sweet.

My rents are doing relatively well all around, too. My mom got a bloodhound puppy named Chase and allows herself to be gnawed on day in and day out.

You'd Let Him Gnaw You, Too.

You’d Let Him Gnaw You, Too.

My step-dad Drew got to retire and seems to be enjoying it. On Thanksgiving, I saw my uncle and cousins at my mom’s house. This is significant in that it’s the first holiday we’ve spent with them in about ten or fifteen years? So I hope it’s a new trend. My cousin Katie got married in the fall and — as a side bonus — the cousins are talking about hanging out this week. It feels pretty good to reconnect. On the other side of things, my other dad Mike let us go up to his house in Maine in the summer and man, that’s awesome. He’s got a great place up there. He just got his knee rebuilt in December and I’ll be visiting him while he recovers. His husband’s an accountant, and this is the time of year when accounting goes crazy, so we won’t see much of Mike Carlson for a few months. Poor dude.


    i will fuck you up i will feel no guilt
    where the fuck are my cookies
    gorilla sniffing cocaine
    its okay i love phil collins
    the frog hits me in the eye and wakes me
    fatty fat fat
    stories about cholera
    lol butts
    the goddess robot

Happy New Year everyone. May 2013 be a baller year.

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